Chapter 8 from “Fully Equipped: Having What It Takes to Give Your All”
Whoso findeth a wife findeth a good thing, and obtaineth favour of the Lord. – Proverbs 18:22
Submitted and Serving
At the end of 2005, I moved home to Arcadia, Florida from New Jersey and submitted myself to my dad’s authority. (Read the previous chapter here.) I began serving wherever needed in the church which included teaching a teen Sunday class. I also got to organize youth groups on Friday nights. This gave me an opportunity to share my passion for missions with them and the needs of persecuted believers around the world. Magazines from Voice of the Martyrs provided me with helpful material about current events.
Once a month, our church would meet up with a couple other churches of like faith for fellowship. One youth group came from Okeechobee. Their unofficial leader was an older teen girl named Jamie Womble. She was their leader simply because she owned a vehicle and could drive them! Though I had met her a little over a year before that at my sister Katie’s high school graduation, Jamie and I had gotten to know a little about each other through email. But that would soon change now that I was back in Florida.
Watching and Waiting
I watched Jamie and saw her talent and the enthusiasm she had for Christ. She taught in a Christian school and did typesetting and editing for Faith Baptist Publications in Fort Pierce. I attended their printing conference and youth conference they held. We got to know more about each other’s interests, and we found we had a lot in common! But I was impressed at how much talent she had and how much she enjoyed serving the Lord. I especially took notice of her when we had a teen activity themed on Bible smuggling. We had a competition between two teams and we each were the leader. She put her whole heart into it and I could picture her on the mission field with me.
Jamie and I became good friends. I knew she was interested in me and I wanted to be sure not to say or do anything that would lead her to believe I liked her. I wanted to be sure that it was the Lord bringing us together, not our emotions. I did not want to lead her to believe I was interested in her romantically if I was not yet willing to enter a committed relationship.
When I Knew She was the One
We got to know each other more through email, and the youth activities. Soon I began to call her on the phone. We always had other people around when we were together and I spoke to her dad letting him know if anything progressed in our friendship, he would be the first to know.
I saw Christ in Jamie’s life. One day while reading Proverbs 31, I realized she excelled all other virtuous women, and she was the one for me. In fact, I wrote her initials (JJW) in my Bible next to Proverbs 31:29.
Honoring our Parents
I continued to talk to my dad about the development of our relationship while waiting on the Lord to move forward. Christmas was coming and so was our church cantata. We invited Jamie’s family to come to our church for that special service, then come to our house for fellowship afterward. That night I gave her a Christmas gift, which was a big move for a budding friendship. The gift was simple: a framed acrostic about a disciple of Christ I had written and a bracelet that a Cambodian missionary had given me.
In January of 2006, the annual county fair was coming up and I invited Jamie to go with me. She brought her sister Kim with her. I had previously asked her dad for permission and he was fine with it. I also asked my dad to eat supper with my mom and her parents so they could freely discuss the two of us and our budding friendship. This would help provide confidence in knowing a little about us and each other’s families. It was important to me that we receive the blessing of both our parents.
Soon after this, Jamie informed me of a Valentine’s Banquet coming up at her school and wondered if I was interested in going with her. I told her I would get back with her. (This really made her nervous!) But I had to handle this cautiously as I viewed this as more than just a casual date. This would mean our friendship was becoming more serious. I told my dad about it and he thought it was a good idea to go. It brought Jamie much relief when I finally called her to let her know I would be honored to take her to the banquet!
Our Courtship Begins
I set up a time with Jamie’s father where I could meet with him before the banquet. We secretly met up at a park near their house in Okeechobee. I told Mr. Womble how much I respected Jamie and saw our friendship leading to a serious relationship. I wanted his permission to court her. This would simply be a time of getting to know one another with the purposeful intention of marriage. We had a wonderful time at the Valentine’s banquet that night.
After the banquet, I informed her of my clandestine meeting with her father at the nearby park. Under the moon-lit sky, I told her officially that I liked her and that I had her father’s blessing to pursue a courtship with her if she felt the same way about me. She returned the sentiment and our relationship instantly rose to another level. Our courtship lasted a month and a half before I proposed to her on a canoe trip. There in the sand I drew a heart and told her for the first time the words, “I love you” and gave her an engagement ring.
Setting Boundaries
We had both decided not to touch – not even shake hands until our wedding day. We would simply draw the boundary as far back as possible, and have a hands-off relationship. It would be hard to refrain, but it would be harder to stop once started! Give the devil a toe hold and he’ll make it a stronghold. We wanted to show our future children by example how to find God’s choice of a life’s mate and get to the marriage altar physically pure. But we got creative and had fun with it. For example, when we went miniature golfing, we held each end of the golf club and pretended that we were holding hands! It was so much fun.
Abstinence is not highly regarded today as it once was, even among many Christians. The fact is, some things are meant only for marriage. Fornication and adultery is the perversion of what God designed as the blessed physical union to be enjoyed between a husband and his wife. If you love God, you will honor this. If you truly love others, you will not want to take advantage of them to attempt to gratify your own lusts. If you think only of yourself, you will not regard their feelings.
Worth the Wait
Our magical moment came on July 22, 2006. There I stood beside my dad, officiate, and my groomsmen. My heart pounded, as I saw my bride come down the aisle. We had prepared for four months for this occasion. We both had our parents blessing, but more importantly, God’s blessing. Now it was appropriate to go forward together hand in hand, heart in heart, in our commitment to one another for life.
The most euphoric moment I’ve ever experienced is when we took one another’s hands and kissed for the first time at the marriage altar! It was definitely worth the wait. What a strong foundation that was laid for a good marriage, because we sought to honor God and His Word, while respecting our parents and each other.
I feel badly when I see so many young people throw away the chance to experience the gift God has allowed us have. God’s way is best. It’s even better than your feelings and what you think you want now. Let Him write your love story! Indeed, life’s greatest gift is eternal life through Jesus Christ. But the second greatest gift is marrying in the will of God! Read 10 Godly Guidelines for Guys and Gals to lay a proper foundation for a great marriage.
Learn more about making the most during the Season of Singleness in this article. You may listen to our audio book Worth the Wait as we each tell the full story of how God brought our paths together on Audible here. The paperback version is available here at Victory Baptist Press.
This is Chapter 8 from “Fully Equipped: Having What It Takes to Give Your All”. Click here to read the book from the beginning.
About the author:
Luke graduated from Crown College of the Bible in 2003. He married Jamie in July of 2006. God has blessed them with five children. Together they had the privilege of serving in the pastorate of a Baptist Church in Florida from 2007-2011.
In August of 2011, our family began our journey to serve the Lord as labourers among Unreached People Groups in Asia. We prepared ourselves at Baptist Bible Translator’s Institute in Bowie, Texas. During that time, God directed our path to work among the Tibetan people in the country of Nepal.
In February of 2014, we moved to Kathmandu, Nepal and experienced God’s work of grace and protection upon our family. We had the privilege to serve at the Crown Nepal Bible College. Teaching classes and preaching at youth conferences was a great opportunity for our family. We also were able to assist in outreaches to villages of the Tamang and Gurung people.
In 2021, we moved to Tampa, Florida. We currently are serving in our home church Southside Baptist Church and teach in the Christian Academy. Luke continues his writing ministry (www.pilgrimoftruth.com) and video messages on his YouTube channel (Pilgrim of Truth). His goal is to aid believers in making Christ known to the world. He continues to seek to assist churches in America. His heart’s desire is to help meet the needs of the unreached people groups in the world.
